Black Family Table Talk
Black Family Table Talk
S6:E6 | Healing From Racism: What's Missing in This Conversation?
Milagros Phillips sits down with Tony and Toni and shares some mind-blowing revelations through her studies about indoctrination and how we can truly heal from the trauma of racism. Milagros Phillips is a keynote speaker, TEDx presenter, four times author, and certified coach.
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As children, we begin to lose a lot of the knowledge and awareness that we come in with, a lot of our power gets siphoned away from us and, and by the time we are adults, we're just doing the best we can. And we're often not always but often in survival, which doesn't lead to thriving.
Tony:Welcome to season six of Black Family Table Talk. We are your host, Toni and Tony. Listen in weekly as we share unique stories that inspire, build and give voice to strengthen black families.
Toni Henson:This season is sponsored by Franz body care. These are handmade products made from organic ingredients. I personally recommend you try free me deodorant, it really works. And it's free of aluminum taupe perfumes and other harmful, pore clogging substances. You can shop these and other black businesses on our website at BlackFamilyTableTalk.com. Welcome to Black Family Table Talk today we have Milagros Phillips. Tell us your story. What made you want to come and share your gifts and talents with Black Family Table Talk
Milagros Phillips:Well, I have been doing healing racism work for over 30 years. I hate to say but like, Oh, it's a long time. And in one of the things that has happened to us as black people, and I'm talking about the diaspora collectively around the world is obviously a lot of our history has been raised, has not certainly doesn't get taught in the schools. In a lot of the stories that are told about us are not necessarily told by us. And so one of the things that happens with that is that I mean, it's a form of propaganda, when you don't allow people to tell their own stories, because you have an agenda. You want it told from your side, right. So I've been doing this work, as I said, for a long time. And one of the things that I realized is that we just don't have enough information to make the transformation from the wound to the healing. And so I recently wrote a book called Cracking the Healers Code of perspective for healing racism, and finding wholeness, because a lot of what happens with how we are taught about race and racism is that it's taught in such a way that as children, we begin to lose a lot of the knowledge and awareness that we come in with a lot of our power gets siphoned away from us and, and by the time we were adults, we're just doing the best we can. And we're often not always, but often in survival, which doesn't lead to thriving, it just keeps us in a cycle of survival. So I wrote this book, because one of the main things that I realized is that we're missing a lot of the history. We're not, like I said, we will learn it in school, nobody teaches us that history. A lot of what is called Black history in this country, is actually the history of white people perpetrating violence upon black and brown people. And as I tell everybody that comes regardless of the color of their skin, when they come to my two day seminar, 20 of the work that I do, is, racism is a problem for people of color. It is not a problem of people of color, and racism is not our problem, we cannot solve that. What we have to do for our own healing, is to become aware of our own Stockholm Syndrome, which is how we internalize the behaviors of the people who kidnapped us. Then we start acting like them and we're not even conscious, especially generation after generation, that we're doing it. I also want people to know and understand that if we're going to heal, we need our history, right? Because when you go to the doctor because something's hurting you, the first thing they ask you for is your history. Well, second thing, they want to know if you can pay them so they want the insurance card. They need your history because they need to understand what's happened in your lineage, so that they can understand, what is happening to you now and create a process of healing that will make you better in the future, right? Whether it's tomorrow or next week or whatever. So the historical pieces are important. Understanding trauma is important. And then having patience and compassion with ourselves because we don't know what we don't know simply again, because we've not been taught a lot of the history. I've wanted to come and speak to our people about what is it we need to heal from, over 500 years of internalized racial conditioning? And really look at what's missing in this conversation?
Tony:This is a topic Toni and I often discuss. I have a quick look at your LinkedIn profile and you mentioned race literacy. Is that a term you coined? What's the background on that terminology and can you define it?
Milagros Phillips:For sure, yeah. So in 2016, I wrote a book called 11 Reasons To Become Race Literate. I was looking for a definition for race literacy, because I just knew there has to be one and I couldn't find. But the closest I came was, there was a woman who was doing research in the UK and she used the phrase, race literacy, to explain what parents- black and brown parents have to tell their children about surviving in this racialized world. My definition of race literacy is very, it's a bit different from that. So my definition of race literacy is the knowledge and awareness of the history of race, how one is acculturated into a racial caste system. The laws and systems in the nation state that support the human divide, and the impact of all of the above on our individual lives, and our collective experience. So that's my definition of race literacy.
Toni Henson:Now, what's your background and training?
Milagros Phillips:I'm an artist.
Toni X:Everything comes from the arts.
Milagros Phillips:I am an artist. I went to music and art High School in New York, I went to FIT Fashion Institute of Technology got a degree in fashion design. I later got a degree in business but really, I'm an artist. I'm an artist at heart, I studied music as well. So music and art and beyond, I started painting and the fine arts. But I also studied music because when I was a little kid, I wanted to be an opera singer. And I was probably the only kid in the country, who by the time I was 11 years old, could sing the entire score to Ti Dia Memoire in Italian. I absolutely loved opera. That was my big thing in life. I wanted to be an opera singer. And I had an interesting encounter, a meet to encounter with my manager in New York. As soon as I turned 18 and they shut my voice down, I stopped singing for about 26 years. Eventually, I started singing again, but it was doing sound therapy. And I began to teach sound therapy, and I stopped teaching it 2008 or something like that. But now I'm feeling very called back to that, in fact, I have an appointment to go into a studio and do some recording in a couple of weeks. I'm an artist through and through.
Toni Henson:That's not unusual, though. I'm the I'm the producer of the Atlanta Black Theatre Festival. I can tell you that art is the source. It's our gift from God to heal, we use art to heal. And it's such a powerful tool. And I believe it is truly a part of our traditional medicine. If you go to any country in Africa, you'll see people are happy and they're thriving, and they're laughing and they're dancing, and they're singing, and that's them channeling that healing. And it's a huge part of being human so I can definitely make that connection.
Tony:So one of the things we're doing with the Atlanta Black Theatre Festival, this is our 10th year anniversary. This is not a plug for the festival, we are taking a group of artists and artists enthusiasts back to Ghana. And one of our missions is to close that gap between Africans in the diaspora. You talked about earlier, no one I history. And I just want to ask you, we were taken, sold into and trade it for and to enslaved, but we were denied our culture, our history, our language. I mean, we lost so much and your training, what does it encompassn when with regard to learning our history and learning who we are, what's your starting point?
Milagros Phillips:Well, I actually start in Europe in the 1400s. I mean, we can start in the 1300s. I started in Europe in the 1400s. Because there were things that are happening there that impacted the world and still continue to impact the world today. And we never talk about it. For instance, the the colonization of Africa, particularly the west coast of Africa, was something that was institutionalized by the Vatican, in the 1400s. It was early to mid 1400s. The pope created something called a papal bulll. By the way, it's called papal bull because there's a little ball that's used at the bottom that was held with a silk string, when they seal it, and stamp it with the the papal seal. Wax the papal seal once they write what they write on parchment. So they had the papacy and monarchy were always at odds with each other, always. So they were trying to find ways to be able to work together. And this was one of the ways that they found. And so what the papacy did, they created something called the doctrine of discovery. And that Doctrine of Discovery basically said, it gave permission to the prince of Portugal, who was known as Henry the Navigator, which by the way, he never sailed, never, you. That was his name given because he supported so many of these groups to go out and sail and conquer. The actual papal bull says to conquer, vanquish, subdue, basically take hold of the land, the waterways, and the people and their possessions and to turn the people into perpetual slaves. That particular piece of Vatican, it's called Vatican legislature, was then revised several times. And the last time they revised it, for this particular thing for this, the conquering colonization was in 1493. What happened in 1493, that's when Columbus went back to Spain after having visited Cascadia. And after it was so many of the Dinos died, and he took some dinos back with him to prove that he had made it to India, because remember that was originally where he wanted to go. So he thought he actually had made it to India, because there were spices, there was plenty of food there. When he went back, he took food, gold silver, in some dinos back with him to prove that he found this land with all this wealth. Well, it wasn't very long before the doctrine of discovery was then enlarged, to include the French, the Spanish, the Dutch, everybody and anybody, because they just figured out that, oh, there's gold in their countries, and silver, and diamonds. All of the things that they were siphoning the wealth out of Africa And now they were siphoning the wealth of all these other smaller islands and larger countries. And so that is what made for the Middle Passage. And a lot of our people don't know that. And the thing is that, you could say, well, that was a long time ago, what's it got to do with us now? Plenty. The Doctrine of Discovery has been used in over 5000 cases, to resolve over 5000 cases, a lot of them are land cases with natives. The last time that the United States of America, the Supreme Court, used the Doctrine of Discovery was in 2005, when Justice Ginsburg used it to win a case against the United Nation in New York, it was Cheryl base versus Oneida. The Land Act, all of these things go back to the Doctrine of Discovery. And basically, the reason that Justice Ginsburg could use that is because the natives, the United had bought some land from Cheryl, which is a town in New York. And of course because of some of the treaties that we actually kept, we broke over 200 treaties with the natives, but one of the trees that we kept was that they don't have to pay taxes on their land. So they buy this land, and within a certain period of time, they get this big tax bill and they're like, Oh, no, you made a mistake, we're not supposed to be paying taxes on our land. And they said, Oh, yes, you are, because that land is now sovereign land. And here's why sovereign land in the Doctrine of Discovery, and basically what it says is, if any European walks on, steps on, steals, buys or anyway has anything to do with the land, the waterway what people always forget, and the people, that they forever, that land, let's just keep it with the land right now, that land becomes sovereign land, which means that it could never again be considered native land. And so therefore, even though they buy it, and they pay it, and it belongs to them, they still have to pay taxes, because it is no longer can revert to native land. It has to remain sovereign land, anywhere that they walked or stepped or stole or squatted or anything, anywhere in the world, anywhere in the world, that was not considered Catholic. Now, this is really important, because a lot of people go, Oh, Christian, no, it wasn't Christian, because there's a broader term. This, the Doctrine of Discovery is very specific. It the doctrine of discovery was for any nation, or groups of people who were not Catholic, because they were considered savages. And so therefore, the Doctrine of Discovery, still, today, it's an international law, by the way, in any country that was ever colonized is still under, Australia used it in 2010, or something like that. Canada used it in 2015. They use it all the time. So any country that was was colonized is still under this international law. And so therefore, any lawyer at any given point in time can use it because like, wow, they can take up the book and go, it's in the book, which is basically what Justice Ginsburg did. But so what it means is that the lands, waterways and the people who are under perpetual slavery, according to the Doctrine of Discovery, are subject to whatever the laws of the doctrine are. And if we don't know that, we can't heal, we can't transform. We can't join the natives in asking the Vatican to resend that law as they can. And as long as the law has not been rescinded, it can be used at any given moment in time against anyone. Remember that it is the land, the waterways, the possession is ended up people.
Tony:That's heavy.
Toni Henson:How did you go from the Doctrine of Discovery to healing because I'm looking at the reviews from your book, and they are phenomenal. And I'm going to read a couple of them, because I'm just blown away by the impact that you've been able to have on people. And this one in particular hit me. It says,"This is an easy read and understood, but brings forth the hard truth of the hot button issue of racism to the fore of how we can process it, and what does it do to the perpetrator and the victim alike. You've really find out that there really is no divide between the two in the long run, because both become a victim of this dark illusion of separation." That's a profound response to your book. And there's so many of them here, cracking the healers code, a prescription for healing racism. Tell us what, how did you get the connection to the two?
Milagros Phillips:Well, I always laugh that spirit has a sense of humor, like, and so if I had started with the doctrine, I probably would have taken a longer time to go through the process, because I would have gotten caught up in it. Because I mean, think about if you're new to that doctrine, like literally, I've been doing this work for over 30 years, when I found out about the doctrine, and it literally made me sick. I was in bed for three days, because it just literally made me sick. This is so sick, and we don't know about it, and nobody tells us and we don't understand it, and then we're going well, why can't we heal? Why don't we all just get along and it's like, hello, you know, we got work to do before we get along with ourselves as well as in the world. So I was actually brought in through a different door, and that was the door of healing. I had been married to someone who was a severe alcoholic. He wasn't a violent alcoholic, but he was somebody who just you couldn't trust him. He would go out and spend the entire paycheck. He was in the military, the entire paycheck, and literally would have to call my mother get milk for my children. So it was a scrambling of who's gonna get to the bank first. It was just crazy. He took out my company car and crashed it, and he didn't have a license at the time. It was like an insane life. Okay, so I needed healing. And so I remember seeking counseling, and I had a great counselor at the time. And he was this lovely man who was white man who happened to also have been gay. And so looking back, I realized, we had connections because we understood oppression. And we understood how thing, there were things that we had in common, he was a really good counselor for me. We were in the military so he got sent away. Then I went through a series of young, white women who were counselors. And by the third one, I remember sitting there, it was my third appointment with this young woman. And I had a really rough week, I mean, really rough week, in my household. And that was also apparent. I remember I walked into the office, and I just burst into tears, because I just feel like I was carrying all this weight. I remember what she said, but I remember sitting there thinking, Oh, my God, I'm screwed. There's nobody here that can help. Because what I realized was that I had lived more in one week than that young woman would ever live in her entire life. And, and so I was like, Oh, my God, if I'm going to get better, it's up to me. I always remember, I used to be a Tupperware lady and the folks that ran the distributorship, had to say, and it was, if it's to be, it's up to me. And I used to always say that, and so I was like, if I'm going to change and change my life, there's nobody out there who can do this for me, I have to do it myself. So I started reading books, and so then I started discovering spirituality, and I started discovering meditation- all of these things. Literally books would fall off the shelf to my hands, because it was almost like my spirit going, girl, you got to do something with your life. So I just really, I was hungry for understanding, healing, how do you manifest your reality. How do you like all of these things. And so I was reading a lot of Christian books and a lot of metaphysical books. I really opened up the platform of learning for myself. And as I began to do that, I started to get better. And at one point, I became healthy, and I realize that I need healing. That kind of vague, you have to be well enough to own your sickness, and then you can understand, then you can unravel it and understand it. And so, as a result of that, I began to really look at what does it take to heal. As I started getting better, and feeling stronger, and strengthened my life, and then my children started kind of looking at what I was doing, they were reading the same books and learning the same things. It became this thing, and my mother and I would talk on the phone, and she started reading the same books I was reading and just became kind of like this family thing. Wow. It's all of us started to to gain our strength and feel better eventually, I had the strength to get a divorce. But that divorce, left me homeless. And so there I was with my three little kids, and I had no idea when I left that house, where I was going to go, where I was going to live. And I remember putting a blanket a pillow in my car and sending my children to some friends and my son saw that and he started crying. And he said, Promise me, you're not going to sleep in the car. Call one of your friends, people love you. Somebody will let you stay with them. Promise me and I promised him so I did call a friend. She goes, oh my god, I have this friend that's leaving town, we can stay at their house. So all of these things started happening that were almost like magic. And I realize I'm being cheerful. And so I come at this healing of racism from the need to care for me for each other. And we need to love one another. Because that's really why we're here this stuff gets in the way. Everybody's child needs to eat, everyone's child should have a home, every parent's job to have the opportunity to get an education, if that's what they desire, or to work. People are here to thrive. And for hundreds of years, this stuff has been getting in the way. So I had written three books before my spirit in my intuition, exposed me to the Doctrine of Discovery.
Tony:Let me let me ask you a couple of questions, you hit on a lot of things. I'm a history buff. So I like to connect some dots here. The Doctrine of Discovery, then there was the Berlin Conference, splitting up Africa and now we have folks against critical race theory. So how do you see race relations or race healing, of trauma coexisting because it's a lot of history? I mean, you went back to the 14th century, the Berlin Conference was in the late 1800s. So it's been going on a long time. And colonization just recently ended in Africa, in the 1950s-1900s. So it's a continuation, it's like it's always a fight or are we winning? Are we losing? Are we gaining ground? How do you feel about that? What's going on?
Milagros Phillips:It's always a fight. Because a lot of what's been done to us leads to confusion. And so some of the confusion is we confuse violence with power. And in fact, the whole survival of the fittest stuff is all about that. I always tell people, they need to stop saying that, how much Darwin put it on a piece of paper? Because it isn't survival of the fittest, it is survival of the most violent, and the ones with the biggest weapons. When you have weapons that, first of all, when you don't even understand the concept of ownership, you understand the concept of stewardship. Those are two very different things. And natives all over the world understood, stewardship. This concept of ownership comes from people who lived in cold climates, who when they looked out into their world, nine months out of the year, there wasn't even a leaf on a tree. And so their perception of the world was one of lack, there's not enough, there's never enough. And we got to go get it from those people over there, because they got some and got weapons that we can use to go get it. Now, if your weapons are set for hunting, for food, you're going to use a different weapon, than if you're using a weapon to hunt human beings. And we need to really understand that like, when I talk to white people about this stuff, what I say is, one of the things that our white brothers and sisters need to do is to face up to the violence that caused them to be traumatized, and then go off and traumatize the rest of the world. It may not be your fingers for responsible for healing it. Understanding that is really important. So how do these things coincide? This whole idea of everything has to be fought through a war, think about. Native people often had, every once in a while they would go to war, that wasn't their first go to. They often we try to work it out, to talk to one another, to find ways of really looking at what is the problem and how can we solve it and how do we do this in a way that we don't kill each other's people. This idea of fighting, everything is part of the problem. I always tell people, if we look at it, if we just kind of peel things away, and we look at life from the perspective of everything's energy. Human beings are energy bodies, we're surrounded by energy. We're energy beings living in a world of energy. And everything's in energy, and the body makes a chemistry which is an energy for everything. When if we're going to look at racism from the perspective of energy, racism lives in the energy of war. We cannot solve racism from the energy of war, because violence begets violence, which means war begets more war. If it isn't one thing, it's another and if you notice that one of the ways that black communities get attacked, is through war. The war on poverty, the war on crime, the war on drugs, it's always some kind of frickin war. It's ridiculous. So how we get our power back and how we take our power back and how we own our power, is by being the sacredness of what we as human beings were created to be, which is love. It's really hard for some people who are living in the war zone. I know that. But I also know that there have been experiments that have been done, like the Maharishi Effect, which is where they take people and they train them to hold the frequency of love in their hearts, in their mind, in their spirit. Our hearts, put out an electromagnetic field that goes up between three, and depending on what's going on in your body, 30 feet beyond your body, but at least between three and eight feet beyond your body. Which means that what you're thinking, what you're feeling, what you're experiencing, affects the people in your field. So what they used to deal with their Maharishi Effect is they would take people and they would train them to hold this frequency of love. And once they were strong enough in that frequency, they would then drop them into places where there was conflict, or war. And what they noticed was that things would come down with just have one person there, and they would remove the person and things will go haywire again. And they did this over and over and over again. You can look it up. It's called the Maharishi Effect. M A H A, R I S, H, I H, I believe. So what that tells us is, if we're truly going to solve racism, we're really going to work on creating a different world. We can't go over there and do it the way they do. Because that's going to create, that it's going to continue to create the havoc that has Oh, that's one of the ways they it's the whole the whole war thing. And all of our great leaders, whether it was Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King, Mother Teresa said one thing, violence begets violence. That's why they worked on peace. If we're really going to shift things, and even in our own bodies, just thinking about the word peace, changes the frequency in our bodies. And I've proven that over and over and over again, because of an exercise that I do in my seminar, to help people find racism in their body, where it lives in their body, and also using the word peace to begin to dissipate that energy. And so what what we know now from science and research, and all of those things, is that, if we are truly going to change things, we cannot continue to do things the way they have been done. That's the definition of madness, because we're not going to get any kind of different effect. We have to do things different to get a different effect. And so one of the things that I talked to people about is learning to hold states of consciousness. And that's a process, learning to hold peace in your body, learning to hold love in your body, learning to just learning to hold different states of consciousness as a way of changing your own frequency, and impacting the frequency of the people around you. And the thing that also has been found through some of these, this research is that one person can change the frequency of 1000s of people.
Tony:So what's the movement like to change this frequency.
Milagros Phillips:Things as simple as meditating on a word, can literally change the frequency in your body. So for instance, let's I'm going to do a little exercise with the two of you right here, right now. If you just take a minute and just take a nice deep breath, and blow it out. You can close your eyes, but what you want to do is you want to just bring your attention to your body. And you want to bring your attention to your feet and notice how they feel on the floor and your shoes and your socks. And then bring your attention to your bottom and feel how it feels on the seat where you're seated. And then bring your attention up to your head. And just kind of notice how your face feels in this moment. Take a nice deep breath, blow it out. And bring your attention inside of your body to the center like the center of your chest and bring your attention there. And notice how your heart is beating and anything else that you notice in your body. And now simply say to yourself without making any sound just simply speaking the word to yourself. Say to yourself the word Racism. Racism. See if you notice anything in your body. Racism. Nice deep breath, blow it out. Again, bring your attention to your chest and simply say to yourself Peace. Peace. And know notice if you see if you notice anything in your body. Peace. Nice deep breath and out. Open your eyes. Could either of you tell the difference between Racism and Peace.
Tony:Absolutely.
Toni Henson:absolutely. There was tension. There was tension. And then there was like, a weight being lifted with the word Peace.
Milagros Phillips:And where did you feel racism?
Toni Henson:Oh, my neck, my back. My stomach. My whole core.
Milagros Phillips:What about you, Tony?
Tony:Same here. Body tensed up.
Milagros Phillips:Yeah. And where did you feel peace?
Tony:Calmness.
Toni Henson:I felt it all over
Tony:I felt it in the breathing. Relaxation.
Milagros Phillips:So you just had a shift, not just in consciousness in the moment but that shift in consciousness, change the chemistry in your body. And you felt it.
Tony:Words on point. Wow.
Toni Henson:This is all biblical. Life and death is in the power of the tongue. love covers a multitude of sins. I'm just hearing all of this scripture come out. We've got the book. Listen, Milagros Phillips, you said one person can make a difference. You are making a difference in the world. Thank you so much. Please tell people how they can, tell us how we can get in touch with you. I will definitely provide a link in the show notes to your book: Cracking the Healers Code A prescription for healing racism and finding wholeness. Let us know how we can get in touch with you, take some of your classes and access you.
Milagros Phillips:I do a two day intensive that when people go through that program, they say they never see race the same way again, it is so transformative for them. And I do that program a few times a year. I have one coming up at the end of the year. You can find me at www.MilagrosPhillips.com which is my name (.com). There are courses there and their classes and information. I have a 15 week program for anyone who's read my book, who wants to go deeper into the healing process. Powerful transformative program, I wrote the book based on the two day program. So I've been doing the work for a very long time. This particular two day program is 20 years old, I started in 2001. There are programs and of course my book is available on Amazon. And the book also has I created a journal with all the chapters in the chapter number so that as people go through the book, they can take notes, and they can jot down feelings and emotions. Because emotions will come up, this is part of discharging, the conditioning is allowing for the emotions to come forth. So so there's a journal that people can access and that's also available on Amazon. I also have I mentioned two of my books, but I also have a book 8 Essentials to Race Conversation that I wrote in 2016, along with 11 reasons to Become Race Literate, and Speaking Race in Healthcare. And I just want to take a moment to say something about Speaking Race in Healthcare. I wrote that book because I'm so annoyed that every time they talk about the research on TV and all over the media, they're always talking about how African Americans have higher incidence of you name, diabetes, high blood pressure. The thing they're not saying is that these are all stress related illnesses. That we carry intergenerational historical trauma that has never been healed. And literally it lives in our bones. And we know that now through epigenetics. And also, we have the micro and macro aggressions that we experience on a regular basis. Talking to a white car colleague at work, who may just say the wrong thing, and we feel that in our bodies. Driving while black talking about walking while black, like you name it. So we live under a tremendous amount of stress and if we don't talk about the fact that these are stress related illnesses, that people who experience a lot of stress on a regular basis are suffering, then we're only telling half the story. And it makes it look like black people are just sick, which we're not, we're some of the healthiest people I know. And so given all that we've been through, not only are we still here, but we're thriving in the best ways that we can, given the circumstances. So we are a people to be proud of anyone who hires us, hire somebody who can really bring a lot of knowledge and wisdom and awareness to an organization. And so I just really want people to get that peace that we are extraordinary beings, living under some very difficult conditions and making it work. The best we can. So important to remember. But you can also email me at info@Milagros Phillips.com so it's just info@(my name) I look forward to hearing from you.
Tony:Well, thank you so much. Milagros. That's Black Family Table Talk.
Toni Henson:You are a diamond. That's what's up.
Milagros Phillips:Oh, thank you so much. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for inviting me. This has been wonderful, and I'm so glad we finally got a chance to get together. So yeah, this is great.
Tony:That concludes this week's talk. We hope you found some tools to add to your strong black family toolbox. And be sure to sign up for a free subscription at BlackFamilyTableTalk.com for special discounts and product offers reserved exclusively for you.
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